operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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