Christians are straight up FREAKS
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
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