So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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