Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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