Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
Randomize