So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
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