Your dad touched me again.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
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I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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