i just google imaged poop.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
it's great music for shaving your balls
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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