I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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