I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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