you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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