Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
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Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
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