theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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