today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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