Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
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