Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(301): View more from Maryland

Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere

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(301): Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere http://tfl.nu/ptau

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(513): View more from Ohio

so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.

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(513): so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup. http://tfl.nu/hrhi

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(209): View more from California

what is college for if not random hookup sex?

(951): View more from California

learning.

(209): View more from California

i would literally fuck learning if i could.

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(209): what is college for if not random hookup sex? (951): learning. (209): i would literally fuck learning if i could. http://tfl.nu/3rtk

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(860): View more from Connecticut

You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.

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(860): You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people. http://tfl.nu/iay5

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(907): View more from Alaska

started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.

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(907): started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night. http://tfl.nu/6i6d

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(781): View more from Massachusetts

I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.

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(781): I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together. http://tfl.nu/rbls

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(703): View more from Virginia

You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.

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(703): You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's. http://tfl.nu/9isl

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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday

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(920): Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday http://tfl.nu/tp2d

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(315): View more from New York

I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?

(718): View more from New York

Keg backpack and a Bike

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(315): I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED? (718): Keg backpack and a Bike http://tfl.nu/7afi

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(503): View more from Oregon

We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.

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(503): We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went. http://tfl.nu/bmv3

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(775): View more from Nevada

Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?

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(775): Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear? http://tfl.nu/c8pp

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(303): View more from Colorado

how did operation slutty penguin go?

(619): View more from California

pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter

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(303): how did operation slutty penguin go? (619): pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter http://tfl.nu/uigh

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(559): View more from California

His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY

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(559): His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY http://tfl.nu/rsnd

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(928): View more from Arizona

The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.

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(928): The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death. http://tfl.nu/lz31

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(276): View more from Virginia

I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me

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(276): I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me http://tfl.nu/m1mj

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