I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
I don't deserve a penis
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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