ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
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