you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
So my ex just asked for my address to send me his wedding invitation... in Europe. Awesome.
That’s basically a green light to fuck his dad
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