i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm gonna write a book. Almost Awesome: all the times I ALMOST got laid.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize