remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Katie Perry lied, you can't just wake up and shake the glitter off your clothes.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
Randomize