I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
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