He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
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