I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
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