is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize