angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Just fell out of the attic onto the garage floor. Okay but might go for an x ray. Smashed one of the kitchen drawers to bits.
Holy Shit Mom
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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