Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
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You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
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Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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