Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize