You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
They totally botched my boob job. My tits look like they're are winking.
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
So apparently I’m into choking now
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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