Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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