Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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