He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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