Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
he farted when he came. not the best ending to my day.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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