I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Don't EVER smell your tampon
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
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