Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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