Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
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