dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
you went into starbucks asked for a mocha "on the rocks"
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize