If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
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you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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