True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
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