While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
Randomize