Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize