what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I kept reassuring him that I was easy like Sunday morning, not easy like "I've had 6 shots of tequila and haven't had sex in three months"
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
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