Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
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