I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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