brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
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