you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
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