her vagine was all disorganized.
Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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