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addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Randomize
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