I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
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