sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
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